#2 Pencil Faith – Entry 12

It is difficult to define a faith out of control; one in which the certainties we once counted on are shaken to their core, and Satan uses our long unanswered questions as weapons against us.  At least we know we are not the first.

In the Garden of Gethsemane the rattle of soldiers’ gear crashed the mood of Jesus’ spiritual anguish, “Not My will, but Yours be done.”  The traitor Judas delivered his treacherous kiss and the arrest commenced.  I picture a violent scuffle with shoving, screaming and perhaps a cuss word or two, followed by Peter’s irrational act.  In the presence of soldiers he drew his sword and cut off the ear of Malchus, the servant of the High Priest.  Horrible!

The poor man must have been brought to his knees, writhing in pain with his hand cupped around a bleeding stub.  Then Jesus reached out and healed him.  In an instant, through a process of supernatural regeneration the man was restored.  And Jesus said, “No more of this!”

“No more of this!”

No more of what?  No more pushing back against the providential plan of God.  No more attempting to control the uncontrollable.  No more interventions into the ministry of the Savior who came to give His life for the world.

Wasn’t it God who delivered a similar message to Job? “Will the one who contends with the Almighty correct him?” (Job 40:2a NIV)  Both Peter and Job were only trying to restore order to chaos when in fact chaos is what has been ordered.

As do we.  Isn’t God a God of order?  Why then do we feel we are working against Him when all we wish is a suitable framework within which to organize our circumstances?  We don’t demand permanence.  Even scaffolding will do.

“No more of this!”  Then, God, what am I supposed to do?

Have you ever felt as though you were working against God when you thought you were working for Him? 

Dear God, help me in my disorder.  In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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About LJones

Minister and story teller.
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